Make A Whirlpool!

It's a Friday night and I'm home alone. There was a bit of drama earlier this evening when I was on the phone talking to my friend Sharyn and I heard Milly chewing or playing with the screen door. The door had come off the tracks earlier on in the week but I thought it was secure until I heard a crash and a yelp. I threw my papers on the floor, hurriedly said goodbye to Sharyn and ran out the door calling for Milly. It was dark and although I called a few times, she didn't come running. I went inside and got the torch, walked around the backyard and still no sign of her. I didn't know what to do and didn't know if she was hurt - I even checked for blood around where the door had fallen but didn't see any. I heard a rustling in the bushes to one side and Milly darted out. I called her but she kept running to the other side of the yard and hid in the bushes there.  I put some food out in her bowl still calling her and then sat in the grass and let mosquitoes bite me. I called her again and finally, I rang the neighbour next door and she went alongside the fence to where Milly was and we were able to coax her out of her hiding spot. She wasn't whimpering or whining but I picked her up and took her back to the porch. She has gotten so big!!! She was happy with all the attention, ate her food and enjoyed being patted. I went inside and had a shower and changed out of those clothes. Milly stinks even though I had washed her a week ago. Finally I calmed down.

I wanted to choose a movie to watch and thought about watching The Proposal. That was a favourite movie of mine and Dave's, even though Dave didn't admit that to anyone else. We even watched it the night before we went for my immigration interview. I decided to watch Pretty Woman instead. It has such a nice ending. Vivienne ends up being valued for who she is, the man she has fallen in love with comes to rescue her and even climbs up an outdoor staircase to reach her on the top floor, despite being scared of heights.

When I was talking to Sharyn earlier on the phone, we'd been discussing men 'of interest'. There's a few guys vying for my attention and although it's flattering, it also flusters me. For those of you who know Dave, you're going to laugh when I say this next thing but I think Dave in some ways, spoilt me. As much as he could be difficult, he had passion and he had zeal. He knew what he wanted and he wanted me to live life to its fullest, too. He didn't always go about it the right way but that part of him, is a part of me too. I don't want to settle for 'nice' or for 'let's just go with the flow'.

When we were growing up, we had a small pool in our backyard and as kids we'd get in there and make a 'whirlpool'. We'd walk round and round the pool until the water was all going in the same direction. If we stopped, we'd fall over and if we let ourselves go, we went in the direction of the whirlpool. It was so much fun. It was fun to try and go in the opposite direction, too. If I ever have the opportunity to meet someone special, I want him to be the one making the whirlpool. I want him to have a zest for life and a commitment to serving, helping, leading, doing what it takes to love God. I want him to see me as a partner in making the whirlpool. It's so much better when more than one person is stirring up the waters.

I know I have a lot of love to give. I like having fun, laughing, sharing, being with my family and friends. Like Milly, I like to be reassured when I'm frightened or if something scary happens. I like to be loved and I enjoy loving others. But I don't like apathy or mediocre. Maybe my expectations are unrealistically high but that's OK with me. I am content with where my life is at right now and I actually don't mind being on my own. It would be nice to find a guy to share the rest of my life with if we're on the same wavelength but in the meantime, I'm going to strive for living my life to the fullest and learning to love God and others in a way that is best for me and that honours God.